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As you know, I am an addict,
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and part of the process of my recovery
is that I must make amends
3
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to those I have wronged.
4
00:00:18,320 --> 00:00:22,040
I have wronged you,
and so I owe you an amends.
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00:00:23,120 --> 00:00:25,480
Oh, Nick, seriously
you don't owe me anything...
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00:00:25,560 --> 00:00:27,760
I'm really going to need you
to accept my amends now.
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All right, amends accepted.
8
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Yay!
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00:00:34,480 --> 00:00:36,040
Now while I'm doing the steps,
10
00:00:36,120 --> 00:00:39,240
alcohol is only permitted
in the northeast corner of this room
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00:00:39,320 --> 00:00:42,040
and also, I'm running
a buddy system in the toilets.
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You and I are not allowed to go
to the toilet unless Jack is with us.
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All right.
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I kind of just want to get back to work.
I want things to be normal,
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like where's Pete?
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"Where's Pete?"
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00:00:52,720 --> 00:00:53,920
"Where is Pete?" she asks.
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I've got Pete working behind the bar
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until he can write a joke
that's not about jizz.
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Sounds like you've implemented
some really positive changes around here.
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Very funny. Not.
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Joke's on you anyway,
because I get a 15% discount on burgers
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00:01:05,800 --> 00:01:08,080
- on weekdays before 4:00 p.m.
- Ah.
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00:01:08,160 --> 00:01:09,720
Oh, Pete, can you get me a ginger ale?
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Right, so what's your game plan, Mae?
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Oh, okay, so I think
I'm just gonna go and talk to George
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and I'm gonna be like,
"Look, I pushed you away.
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"I thought I had to fix my brain
by myself,
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00:01:22,040 --> 00:01:23,656
but really we could work through some..."
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00:01:23,680 --> 00:01:26,480
- I'm talking about your career, Mae.
- Oh. Uh...
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00:01:26,560 --> 00:01:28,720
Donna Ridley has been emailing me
about you.
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She wants to represent you,
which is fucked,
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because I've been trying
to get her to sign me for five years.
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Who is Donna Ridley?
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Donna's a massive agent.
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00:01:36,080 --> 00:01:38,360
- Yeah.
- Is she? All right.
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Well, that's wicked.
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Well, maybe I'll get her to sign me.
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'Cause if I sign with her,
I can go to George's and I can be like,
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00:01:44,080 --> 00:01:45,800
"Look, I'm really
getting my shit together."
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00:01:45,880 --> 00:01:49,600
Or I was thinking maybe you and I
could go out to a nice French restaurant
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00:01:49,680 --> 00:01:50,680
or something.
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00:01:59,600 --> 00:02:04,480
So I've never really had an agent before,
but I do seriously want to get on TV.
44
00:02:04,560 --> 00:02:07,320
- When's your birthday?
- Uh, it's May 2nd.
45
00:02:07,400 --> 00:02:08,760
Uh, when is... when is yours?
46
00:02:08,840 --> 00:02:09,840
October 31st.
47
00:02:09,920 --> 00:02:12,080
Oh, that's spooky.
48
00:02:12,160 --> 00:02:13,160
Why is it spooky?
49
00:02:13,920 --> 00:02:14,920
It's Halloween.
50
00:02:15,000 --> 00:02:18,320
See? Look at us. We're talking,
we're building a relationship.
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00:02:18,400 --> 00:02:20,536
I really want to work with you, Mae.
What do you think?
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00:02:20,560 --> 00:02:22,280
I think that's sickhead to the max.
53
00:02:22,360 --> 00:02:25,240
Yeah, 'cause I've been kind of plateaued
at one tier for a while,
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00:02:25,320 --> 00:02:27,080
but I have all this new material.
55
00:02:27,160 --> 00:02:29,760
- Great. What's it about?
- Okay. So sloths.
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00:02:29,840 --> 00:02:31,520
Um, Chevy Chase.
57
00:02:32,200 --> 00:02:34,080
- Also, noodles is one.
- No.
58
00:02:34,160 --> 00:02:37,280
Wrong. See,
what I love about you is you're very now.
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00:02:37,360 --> 00:02:40,120
You're an addict.
You're anxious. You're trans.
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00:02:40,200 --> 00:02:42,120
Am I trans? 'Cause I'm kind of
on the fence...
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00:02:42,200 --> 00:02:44,360
You look like something
out of Deep Space Nine.
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00:02:44,440 --> 00:02:46,240
You're a lonely millennial.
63
00:02:46,320 --> 00:02:48,936
Oh, I'm thinking about getting back
together with my ex-girlfriend.
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00:02:48,960 --> 00:02:51,880
Really? The one from your set?
Who made you feel like a dog?
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00:02:52,480 --> 00:02:55,680
Well, I mean, you haven't seen her
and she glows like the Olympic flame.
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00:02:55,760 --> 00:02:56,960
I don't like it.
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00:02:57,040 --> 00:02:59,200
What I love
is you've come from outer space.
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You've left your terrible relationship
and you're ready to fuck.
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00:03:03,080 --> 00:03:04,760
Yeah. Um...
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00:03:06,000 --> 00:03:08,920
I'm gonna think about it.
And also, I'm so sorry,
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00:03:09,000 --> 00:03:10,800
but I have an appointment
with my butcher.
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00:03:10,880 --> 00:03:13,456
Okay, babe, but when you're ready
to get as excited about yourself
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00:03:13,480 --> 00:03:14,840
as I am about you, give me a bell.
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00:03:14,920 --> 00:03:17,400
I'll bring the big boss to see you.
Get me Cindy on the line?
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00:03:17,480 --> 00:03:19,920
- I want to talk about Vice.
- What?
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00:03:20,000 --> 00:03:22,080
- I'm on the phone.
- Okay.
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00:03:44,600 --> 00:03:46,200
- Hey!
- Mae!
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00:03:46,280 --> 00:03:48,520
- Hi. How are you?
- Hi.
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00:03:48,600 --> 00:03:49,640
I didn't... Wha...
80
00:03:49,720 --> 00:03:50,920
What?
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00:03:51,000 --> 00:03:52,480
I... I didn't know you were back.
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00:03:52,560 --> 00:03:55,840
Yeah, um, I've been back
a couple of weeks and I just...
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00:03:55,920 --> 00:03:56,960
I didn't... I didn't call,
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00:03:57,040 --> 00:04:00,240
'cause I just thought I'd come by
and see how... how you are.
85
00:04:00,320 --> 00:04:02,920
And I mean, I forgot what you look like.
It's crazy.
86
00:04:03,480 --> 00:04:06,960
I mean,
you look like the archangel Gabriel,
87
00:04:07,040 --> 00:04:10,920
through the clouds shining down
into a splendor upon us from heaven.
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00:04:11,960 --> 00:04:15,720
Hi. Listen, I've got to run,
but I'll see you tomorrow, yeah?
89
00:04:21,040 --> 00:04:23,920
- Is that a work colleague?
- I'm so sorry. I didn't...
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00:04:24,000 --> 00:04:27,440
Because I didn't... I didn't know
that you were... that you were coming.
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00:04:27,520 --> 00:04:28,520
Okay.
92
00:04:29,040 --> 00:04:30,840
So you two are snacking fresh?
93
00:04:32,160 --> 00:04:33,480
You're dating that handsome hunk?
94
00:04:33,560 --> 00:04:37,080
It's just that when you...
when you, like, ended things for good,
95
00:04:37,160 --> 00:04:38,680
I... I just sort of...
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00:04:38,760 --> 00:04:39,920
It's tubular, dude.
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00:04:40,000 --> 00:04:42,760
- I brought these for Phil anyway.
- Oh God. Mae.
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00:04:42,840 --> 00:04:46,600
No, look, it's fine. I'm happy for you
and also, I'm happy for me,
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00:04:46,680 --> 00:04:49,040
because I'm also...
I'm dating someone as well.
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00:04:49,120 --> 00:04:50,120
Really?
101
00:04:50,640 --> 00:04:51,840
- Yeah.
- Who?
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00:04:52,840 --> 00:04:54,760
I'm dating Jack.
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00:04:55,720 --> 00:04:57,160
- Okay.
- Anyway, I'm gonna go.
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00:04:57,240 --> 00:04:59,960
I don't want to bother you anymore.
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00:05:00,040 --> 00:05:02,560
- Oh God.
- Oh no, George.
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00:05:02,640 --> 00:05:06,200
Listen. Oh, I fucked this up
'cause I ended things,
107
00:05:06,280 --> 00:05:08,720
I drew a line under it,
and it was such a mess with us
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00:05:08,800 --> 00:05:11,160
and this is good, you know?
109
00:05:11,240 --> 00:05:14,001
It's probably like healthy, I think,
that... that you're seeing someone.
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00:05:14,040 --> 00:05:17,760
- Like, it's fast, but it's probably...
- Mae, I really want you in my life.
111
00:05:17,840 --> 00:05:19,800
So can we be friends?
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00:05:22,400 --> 00:05:23,400
Yeah.
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00:05:24,040 --> 00:05:26,960
I'd absolutely love to be your friend.
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00:05:30,760 --> 00:05:32,840
- Would you give these to Phil?
- Yep.
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00:05:32,920 --> 00:05:35,080
And tell him I love him?
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00:05:39,440 --> 00:05:43,760
- I'm not gonna be her friend.
- Why not?
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00:05:43,840 --> 00:05:47,400
Because I can see
my unborn children in her eyes.
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00:05:47,480 --> 00:05:49,680
Right now you can, but that'll pass.
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00:05:49,760 --> 00:05:52,520
Oh, man, you should have seen this guy.
He's so fucking cool.
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00:05:52,600 --> 00:05:56,800
He probably like takes her dancing
and like spins around on the dance floor.
121
00:05:56,880 --> 00:05:59,160
Oh, man, I knew
she'd get a boyfriend right away.
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00:05:59,240 --> 00:06:01,400
I should never have dated
a bisexual person.
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00:06:01,920 --> 00:06:04,040
- Aren't you bisexual?
- Yes.
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00:06:04,120 --> 00:06:05,160
Yes, I am.
125
00:06:05,880 --> 00:06:08,040
Probably bounced on more balls
than she has,
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00:06:08,120 --> 00:06:11,600
but I'm also a massive, massive hypocrite.
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00:06:11,680 --> 00:06:15,280
Look, you ended things
with her for a reason,
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00:06:15,360 --> 00:06:16,960
because you wanted her to be happy.
129
00:06:17,040 --> 00:06:20,200
Now it's your job to be a big boy
and be her friend.
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00:06:20,280 --> 00:06:23,440
What am I supposed to do, like
hang out with her and her new boyfriend?
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00:06:23,520 --> 00:06:25,240
Prove to her that you've grown.
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00:06:26,480 --> 00:06:27,800
How come you don't live here?
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00:06:27,880 --> 00:06:30,720
Oh, we've been over this.
I'm very busy masturbating into a sock.
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00:06:33,680 --> 00:06:35,880
All right. I'll ask her to hang out.
135
00:06:37,120 --> 00:06:39,520
Thanks, Scott. Love you. Bye.
136
00:06:40,280 --> 00:06:41,840
Mae, do you want...
137
00:06:41,920 --> 00:06:43,000
- Ow!
- Oh shit!
138
00:06:44,280 --> 00:06:45,600
Sorry. Sorry.
139
00:06:46,240 --> 00:06:49,480
Listen, I'm thinking about asking George
and her new boyfriend on a double date.
140
00:06:49,560 --> 00:06:51,960
- Would you mind going with me?
- What, you and me?
141
00:06:52,040 --> 00:06:53,720
I've never wanted anything more!
142
00:06:53,800 --> 00:06:56,480
Great. Also, I accidentally lied
and I told them we're dating,
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00:06:56,560 --> 00:06:58,840
so you just have
to like pretend that you love me.
144
00:06:59,680 --> 00:07:02,440
But, I do love you.
145
00:07:02,520 --> 00:07:05,240
Hi, uh, so as... as you know,
146
00:07:05,320 --> 00:07:08,600
Elliott and I wanted to set up a group
to discuss social activism
147
00:07:08,680 --> 00:07:12,200
and try and find ways
for the students to get involved as well.
148
00:07:12,280 --> 00:07:15,680
- Um, I want to do like a big event like...
- Sorry.
149
00:07:15,760 --> 00:07:17,800
Before we start, maybe we should check in?
150
00:07:17,880 --> 00:07:20,320
- Check in?
- Hi. I'm Elliott.
151
00:07:20,400 --> 00:07:22,440
I'm a bi-poly-cis man,
152
00:07:22,520 --> 00:07:25,720
and really happy to be sharing the space
with like-minded individuals.
153
00:07:25,800 --> 00:07:28,160
Becky, cishet.
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00:07:28,240 --> 00:07:33,720
Uh, today, I am really struggling
with the amount of space I'm taking up
155
00:07:33,800 --> 00:07:36,840
as a polluter against the amount of space
156
00:07:36,920 --> 00:07:39,760
that I rightfully should be taking up
as a woman.
157
00:07:40,640 --> 00:07:42,520
- Troubling.
- Yeah.
158
00:07:43,480 --> 00:07:44,360
I'm Clocky.
159
00:07:44,440 --> 00:07:47,000
Clocky Powers,
gay as a hog, and I'm raging.
160
00:07:47,080 --> 00:07:49,640
Pauline, the dinner lady,
knows I can't stand coriander,
161
00:07:49,720 --> 00:07:53,080
and today my saucy sarnie
was absolutely chocker with it.
162
00:07:53,160 --> 00:07:55,080
Now, she says it was an accident,
but I know.
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00:07:55,160 --> 00:07:57,720
It's 'cause I said her daughter
looked like Harvey Keitel.
164
00:07:57,800 --> 00:07:59,520
Okay. Um...
165
00:08:00,160 --> 00:08:04,160
Well, I've... I've never really,
like, "checked in" before
166
00:08:04,240 --> 00:08:05,960
but, uh, hi.
167
00:08:06,560 --> 00:08:10,520
I'm George
and I'm trying to grow as a person.
168
00:08:11,840 --> 00:08:14,120
George, great check in.
169
00:08:14,200 --> 00:08:16,680
Um, I noticed that you didn't identify?
170
00:08:16,760 --> 00:08:20,160
Yeah. I don't... I don't really do that.
171
00:08:20,240 --> 00:08:22,280
Like, I'm... I'm just George.
172
00:08:26,760 --> 00:08:28,080
Okay. Well,
173
00:08:29,240 --> 00:08:31,840
I'm... I'm seeing Elliott and...
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00:08:31,920 --> 00:08:34,080
But I did have a girlfriend called Mae.
175
00:08:34,160 --> 00:08:35,920
- Oh.
- Well, it was quite roller-coastery.
176
00:08:36,000 --> 00:08:37,520
Like, she's an addict.
177
00:08:37,600 --> 00:08:39,960
Um, coke, and...
178
00:08:40,040 --> 00:08:43,840
Well, I do think... I think she might
have dealt heroin as a teenager.
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00:08:44,960 --> 00:08:47,360
Um, anyway, but that's all.
That's great now, that's fine.
180
00:08:47,440 --> 00:08:48,720
Yeah. So.
181
00:08:50,280 --> 00:08:52,720
Um, actually Elliott and I
are going on a double date
182
00:08:52,800 --> 00:08:55,600
with her and her new boyfriend
on Saturday, so you know,
183
00:08:55,680 --> 00:08:58,760
who knows,
maybe we'll all just have a big gang bang.
184
00:08:59,720 --> 00:09:03,720
Um, Mae sounds like
she's incredibly vulnerable.
185
00:09:03,800 --> 00:09:07,840
Are you sort of sure it's safe
to be still spending time together,
186
00:09:07,920 --> 00:09:10,560
you know, especially
if the relationship was toxic?
187
00:09:10,640 --> 00:09:11,720
Toxic?
188
00:09:12,560 --> 00:09:13,880
No, it wasn't... it wasn't...
189
00:09:13,960 --> 00:09:17,200
Becky, I think if George is open
to processing with Mae,
190
00:09:17,280 --> 00:09:20,200
then friendship with an ex
can really help put a full stop
191
00:09:20,280 --> 00:09:22,520
on a painful chapter, don't you think?
192
00:09:23,240 --> 00:09:25,880
Oh my God, you are
so emotionally literate.
193
00:09:31,920 --> 00:09:34,120
- Christmas Jones! Sorry.
- Oh! Fuck you!
194
00:09:34,200 --> 00:09:37,080
- I wish I didn't do that.
- No, it was... it was funny.
195
00:09:37,160 --> 00:09:39,680
Okay, sorry. Jack's parking,
so I thought I'd spook you.
196
00:09:39,760 --> 00:09:42,480
- Okay.
- Good day, time travelers.
197
00:09:42,560 --> 00:09:45,560
My name is Professor Spink
and welcome to...
198
00:09:45,640 --> 00:09:48,320
I'm so sorry.
We're waiting for a couple of people.
199
00:09:51,840 --> 00:09:53,920
- It's really nice to see you.
- Yeah, you too.
200
00:09:54,000 --> 00:09:55,120
Absolutely lovely.
201
00:09:56,360 --> 00:09:58,400
How are you, and how's Elliott?
202
00:09:59,160 --> 00:10:01,080
Is the... And is the sex good?
203
00:10:02,080 --> 00:10:04,960
Mae, come on. You can't... Don't do that.
204
00:10:05,560 --> 00:10:07,840
That's not fair.
You broke up with me, remember?
205
00:10:07,920 --> 00:10:09,080
Yeah. No, I did.
206
00:10:11,640 --> 00:10:14,360
- Do you really want to know?
- Yes. Yes.
207
00:10:14,440 --> 00:10:16,280
It is... It's quite...
208
00:10:17,800 --> 00:10:18,640
tender?
209
00:10:18,720 --> 00:10:19,960
What do you mean, tender?
210
00:10:20,040 --> 00:10:23,800
Like he kind of likes to make eye contact
and, like, emotionally connect.
211
00:10:23,880 --> 00:10:26,240
Oh my God. During?
212
00:10:26,320 --> 00:10:27,880
- Yeah.
- That's crazy.
213
00:10:27,960 --> 00:10:31,480
I would never emotionally connect
with you during sex.
214
00:10:31,560 --> 00:10:33,800
Doesn't he know all you want
is to get thrown around
215
00:10:33,880 --> 00:10:35,960
like a slutty bag of beans?
216
00:10:36,040 --> 00:10:38,160
Oh, I forgot you're funny.
217
00:10:38,240 --> 00:10:39,800
- Hey, baby.
- Hi.
218
00:10:39,880 --> 00:10:40,880
Hey.
219
00:10:42,040 --> 00:10:43,040
Okay.
220
00:10:43,880 --> 00:10:45,360
Thank you.
221
00:10:45,440 --> 00:10:46,720
- George.
- Jack.
222
00:10:47,960 --> 00:10:49,240
I'm on shrooms.
223
00:10:49,320 --> 00:10:50,560
- You're on mushrooms?
- Yeah.
224
00:10:50,640 --> 00:10:52,440
Guys, I'm so sorry I'm late.
225
00:10:52,520 --> 00:10:53,440
So sorry.
226
00:10:53,520 --> 00:10:55,080
- Hey. Hey.
- Hey, gorgeous.
227
00:10:55,160 --> 00:10:56,160
He's fit.
228
00:10:56,200 --> 00:10:57,240
- Mae.
- Hi.
229
00:10:57,320 --> 00:10:59,040
- I've heard so much about you.
- Oh, good.
230
00:10:59,120 --> 00:11:01,640
I think it's really beautiful
that you suggested this.
231
00:11:01,720 --> 00:11:04,440
Oh, yes, yes. Beautiful.
232
00:11:04,520 --> 00:11:08,040
Welcome, time travelers, to ancient Egypt.
233
00:11:08,120 --> 00:11:12,520
It appears
that my evil twin brother, Dr. Spink,
234
00:11:12,600 --> 00:11:15,600
has trapped us in Tutankhamun's tomb.
235
00:11:15,680 --> 00:11:16,520
Oh, no.
236
00:11:16,600 --> 00:11:18,720
You have one hour to escape the tomb
237
00:11:18,800 --> 00:11:22,040
and stop Ragnarök with the Orb of Ra!
238
00:11:22,920 --> 00:11:25,000
And please don't pull
the stuff off the walls, okay?
239
00:11:25,080 --> 00:11:27,280
Otherwise I get
a right fucking bollocking, yeah?
240
00:11:28,600 --> 00:11:30,960
- Do that again.
- Like the legs?
241
00:11:31,040 --> 00:11:34,120
Mae, so you and Jack
seem like a wonderful couple.
242
00:11:34,640 --> 00:11:35,680
Oh, yeah.
243
00:11:35,760 --> 00:11:38,760
- We really are. He's a very special guy.
- Great.
244
00:11:39,440 --> 00:11:40,440
Oh.
245
00:11:42,200 --> 00:11:45,840
Listen, I think it's great that you and
George have got to this place of closure
246
00:11:45,920 --> 00:11:46,800
so quickly.
247
00:11:46,880 --> 00:11:51,320
Yeah, we've always moved
very quickly through the stages of...
248
00:11:51,400 --> 00:11:54,600
Like, we... we moved in together
insanely quickly, actually.
249
00:11:54,680 --> 00:11:57,200
Perhaps that acceleration
contributed to it ending.
250
00:11:57,800 --> 00:12:00,400
I don't think maybe we need
to talk about this right now.
251
00:12:00,480 --> 00:12:02,960
Well, maybe Mae wants to talk about it.
252
00:12:03,040 --> 00:12:04,160
- Yeah. Okay.
- Um...
253
00:12:04,760 --> 00:12:07,200
To be honest,
we've never really talked about it.
254
00:12:07,960 --> 00:12:11,040
- And it was my fault that it ended.
- It was... It was my fault that it ended.
255
00:12:11,120 --> 00:12:14,000
George, what are you talking about?
I came into your life like a tornado
256
00:12:14,080 --> 00:12:15,440
full of sticks and poo.
257
00:12:19,000 --> 00:12:24,160
I made Mae, like, erratic and anxious,
by keeping you a secret.
258
00:12:24,240 --> 00:12:27,200
- I mean, I... I was so repressed.
- That's not true.
259
00:12:27,280 --> 00:12:28,480
She self-destructed.
260
00:12:28,560 --> 00:12:30,720
Self-destructed?
I mean, what did that look like?
261
00:12:31,320 --> 00:12:33,760
She relapsed.
262
00:12:33,840 --> 00:12:37,400
Okay, I mean, look, it was one night
of coke with a sad businessman.
263
00:12:37,480 --> 00:12:38,480
What?
264
00:12:39,080 --> 00:12:40,800
- You did coke?
- I thought that's what...
265
00:12:40,880 --> 00:12:43,480
Mae, I was talking about the pills
in the hospital. You did coke?
266
00:12:43,560 --> 00:12:45,920
Look, I fucked up,
but then I went to rehab in Canada
267
00:12:46,000 --> 00:12:47,360
and now I'm absolutely fine now.
268
00:12:47,440 --> 00:12:49,040
You went to rehab and I was like...
269
00:12:49,120 --> 00:12:52,720
I was just here hooking up
with someone else. Mae, I'm so sorry.
270
00:12:52,800 --> 00:12:54,800
I mean, I hooked up
with someone first anyway.
271
00:12:54,880 --> 00:12:56,280
What, who? Jack?
272
00:12:57,920 --> 00:12:59,120
I had sex with Lava.
273
00:12:59,200 --> 00:13:00,560
Oh fuck off. What?
274
00:13:03,720 --> 00:13:05,960
- Do you still have feelings for her?
- No, I do not.
275
00:13:06,040 --> 00:13:09,080
- I do not. Of course not.
- 'Cause I just always felt important...
276
00:13:10,400 --> 00:13:12,240
Okay, say cheese!
277
00:13:13,160 --> 00:13:14,720
Can you stop crying?
278
00:13:15,520 --> 00:13:17,400
- Cheese.
- Cheese!
279
00:13:19,920 --> 00:13:20,920
Oh God.
280
00:13:21,320 --> 00:13:24,320
Oh God, I'm so sorry, Elliott.
That was hell.
281
00:13:24,400 --> 00:13:25,240
Yeah.
282
00:13:25,320 --> 00:13:29,440
Yeah, well, but look, George, I would
never ever, ever tell you what to do.
283
00:13:29,520 --> 00:13:30,560
- All right?
- Yeah.
284
00:13:30,640 --> 00:13:33,840
It just feels like
if you guys can't even spend ten minutes
285
00:13:33,920 --> 00:13:36,960
in an Egyptian tomb
without completely imploding,
286
00:13:37,040 --> 00:13:39,600
some real healing needs to happen
before you spend time together.
287
00:13:39,680 --> 00:13:41,160
What do I do?
288
00:13:41,240 --> 00:13:43,440
I mean, look, it's not for me to say.
It really isn't.
289
00:13:43,520 --> 00:13:45,880
- And as a rule, I never give any advice.
- Okay.
290
00:13:45,960 --> 00:13:47,640
But I would completely cut contact.
291
00:13:55,680 --> 00:13:57,320
- Hey. You okay?
- Hi.
292
00:14:02,200 --> 00:14:04,520
I guess we're not really friends yet,
are we?
293
00:14:04,600 --> 00:14:07,000
- Maybe we should like just...
- Yeah.
294
00:14:10,360 --> 00:14:13,280
Can you promise me
that you are not going to self-destruct?
295
00:14:15,440 --> 00:14:16,880
'Course I'm not...
296
00:14:16,960 --> 00:14:18,840
'Course I'm not gonna self-destruct.
297
00:14:19,600 --> 00:14:22,480
- So what are you gonna do now?
- I think I'm gonna self-destruct.
298
00:14:25,840 --> 00:14:27,520
Hello?
299
00:14:28,200 --> 00:14:32,480
Sorry, I'm a massive fan of your comedy.
Sorry for being weird.
300
00:14:32,560 --> 00:14:35,040
- Ah.
- I just think you're really brave,
301
00:14:35,120 --> 00:14:37,040
like getting clean.
302
00:14:37,800 --> 00:14:39,640
Can't wait to see
what you do next.
303
00:14:39,720 --> 00:14:40,800
She's gonna self-destruct.
304
00:14:40,880 --> 00:14:42,120
- Oh.
- Well, I...
305
00:14:42,200 --> 00:14:43,200
Okay.
306
00:14:44,920 --> 00:14:47,520
I hope you don't.
307
00:14:47,600 --> 00:14:48,600
Sorry.
308
00:14:48,960 --> 00:14:50,160
- Bye.
- Bye.
309
00:14:51,160 --> 00:14:53,280
I... I hope you don't either, by the way.
310
00:15:10,360 --> 00:15:13,760
I'm so glad you called.
I told everyone in the office about you.
311
00:15:13,840 --> 00:15:15,800
Like I'm totally fucking hog wild.
312
00:15:15,880 --> 00:15:19,800
I even brought the big boss to see you.
Why don't you do some trans stuff tonight?
313
00:15:19,880 --> 00:15:23,360
- Okay. So do you think I'm trans?
- And take a groupie home after the show.
314
00:15:23,440 --> 00:15:26,080
We love that. Do you know
we used to represent David Wells?
315
00:15:26,160 --> 00:15:28,000
The rebel rock star comedian of the 90s.
316
00:15:28,080 --> 00:15:29,720
Didn't he die in a hotel room?
317
00:15:29,800 --> 00:15:32,320
Where can I get
like a pint of wine around here?
318
00:15:32,920 --> 00:15:35,400
Hey, can you tell Donna
I'm looking to sign with someone too.
319
00:15:36,000 --> 00:15:37,520
Yeah, yeah, I guess, yeah.
320
00:15:39,640 --> 00:15:40,880
All right, what's up?
321
00:15:41,400 --> 00:15:42,400
Um...
322
00:15:43,000 --> 00:15:44,000
I miss George.
323
00:15:44,920 --> 00:15:47,600
I miss blow.
But we're both better off now.
324
00:15:49,800 --> 00:15:50,920
Are we?
325
00:15:51,000 --> 00:15:53,320
Because I just keep replaying the past.
326
00:15:54,760 --> 00:15:55,760
Check this out.
327
00:15:56,320 --> 00:15:58,320
- Thirty days sober.
- That's good.
328
00:15:58,400 --> 00:15:59,720
Well done, man. Well done.
329
00:16:00,240 --> 00:16:03,080
You see this key chain,
and Donna out there.
330
00:16:03,600 --> 00:16:05,200
That's progress.
We're getting shit done.
331
00:16:05,280 --> 00:16:08,120
So stop acting like
some aging retired rocker.
332
00:16:08,200 --> 00:16:09,840
You're 30 and you look 12.
333
00:16:09,920 --> 00:16:11,840
Look ahead.
334
00:16:11,920 --> 00:16:13,840
Leave all that toxic shit in the past.
335
00:16:27,920 --> 00:16:29,920
- Hi.
- Hey. Hi, it's Mae.
336
00:16:30,720 --> 00:16:31,560
Uh, Mae Martin.
337
00:16:31,640 --> 00:16:32,720
Yeah.
338
00:16:32,800 --> 00:16:37,320
I... I'm really sorry for calling.
I just... I wanted to ask you something.
339
00:16:37,920 --> 00:16:41,840
Um, do you think
that we were, like, toxic?
340
00:16:43,440 --> 00:16:44,920
I keep hearing that word.
341
00:16:45,600 --> 00:16:48,760
Um, I don't know anymore.
342
00:16:50,000 --> 00:16:51,000
Sometimes.
343
00:16:51,040 --> 00:16:52,400
Yeah, maybe sometimes,
344
00:16:53,560 --> 00:16:57,200
but then didn't it sometimes
also feel good?
345
00:16:57,280 --> 00:16:58,280
Like...
346
00:16:59,520 --> 00:17:01,280
Like pushing on a bruise, you know?
347
00:17:01,800 --> 00:17:03,000
Yeah, fuck, it did.
348
00:17:03,080 --> 00:17:06,440
Do you remember, like,
that first night that we met?
349
00:17:07,080 --> 00:17:08,776
Is someone at the door?
350
00:17:08,800 --> 00:17:11,840
- Perhaps a package you need to sign for?
- I've got an Elliott.
351
00:17:11,920 --> 00:17:13,520
Elliott's coming over.
352
00:17:13,600 --> 00:17:15,040
Oh. Um...
353
00:17:15,120 --> 00:17:15,960
Yeah, cool.
354
00:17:16,040 --> 00:17:18,520
Okay. Well, I have to go anyway.
I have to go on stage,
355
00:17:18,600 --> 00:17:21,760
and after the show, I'll probably
have sexual intercourse with Jack.
356
00:17:22,360 --> 00:17:23,520
- Okay.
- Maybe a fan.
357
00:17:23,600 --> 00:17:26,200
Just do some really
sort of fucked-up stuff.
358
00:17:26,280 --> 00:17:29,720
- Okay.
- So you enjoy being tender with Elliott.
359
00:17:29,800 --> 00:17:30,680
Yeah.
360
00:17:30,760 --> 00:17:33,720
And I will talk to you
in a couple of months.
361
00:17:33,800 --> 00:17:34,920
Okay. Bye.
362
00:17:40,600 --> 00:17:42,800
Are we really having
sexual intercourse later?
363
00:17:42,880 --> 00:17:46,440
Part of the process of my recovery
is that I must make amends
364
00:17:46,520 --> 00:17:47,760
to those I have wronged.
365
00:17:48,280 --> 00:17:50,520
I have wronged you all
and I owe you an amends.
366
00:17:51,920 --> 00:17:53,880
Stop laughing, this... this isn't a joke.
367
00:17:55,360 --> 00:17:58,000
Whatever. Just, um, welcome to the stage,
368
00:17:58,640 --> 00:17:59,840
Mae Martin.
369
00:18:05,880 --> 00:18:08,600
Uh, I'm Mae,
it's nice to be back at the Gag Bin.
370
00:18:09,640 --> 00:18:12,880
Um, so what do you guys think
about Chevy Chase?
371
00:18:12,960 --> 00:18:15,000
You think that guy's
pretty wackadoodle or what?
372
00:18:23,480 --> 00:18:25,320
Do you want to talk
about my personal despair?
373
00:18:25,400 --> 00:18:26,696
- Yeah.
- Is that more...
374
00:18:26,720 --> 00:18:29,880
Yeah. All right. Well,
I broke up with my girlfriend recently.
375
00:18:29,960 --> 00:18:31,616
- Aw.
- Thank you for your sympathy,
376
00:18:31,640 --> 00:18:33,520
um, and she's on a date right now
377
00:18:34,320 --> 00:18:39,520
and I'm just a dehydrated Sea-Monkey,
I guess, waiting to be reanimated
378
00:18:39,600 --> 00:18:41,640
by a droplet of her love.
379
00:18:41,720 --> 00:18:45,760
My point is if anybody wants me
to ferociously finger them after the show,
380
00:18:45,840 --> 00:18:48,000
I'm more than happy to do that.
381
00:18:48,080 --> 00:18:51,240
Whoo! Yes! Pick me!
382
00:18:51,320 --> 00:18:53,920
Wow. Okay. Thank you.
383
00:18:54,880 --> 00:18:56,760
For the queer Amish farmers,
384
00:18:56,840 --> 00:18:58,960
Rumspringa is a welcome respite...
385
00:18:59,040 --> 00:19:01,200
Can you pass the wasabi peas?
386
00:19:02,200 --> 00:19:03,640
- Yeah.
- Please.
387
00:19:05,280 --> 00:19:06,280
Thanks.
388
00:19:06,800 --> 00:19:07,800
Um...
389
00:19:08,160 --> 00:19:09,160
So, hey.
390
00:19:10,520 --> 00:19:13,280
So, I'm... I'm really loving this doc,
391
00:19:14,160 --> 00:19:18,080
but, um, there's this...
there's this really fit
392
00:19:18,600 --> 00:19:23,400
Ukrainian group sex video on YouPorn
that I've been wanking to recently.
393
00:19:24,080 --> 00:19:26,120
- Right.
- Wait. I'm actually gonna...
394
00:19:27,480 --> 00:19:30,320
So it's set in this, um,
in this Soviet nunnery
395
00:19:30,400 --> 00:19:34,680
and the nuns are routinely punished
by their lecherous archbishop,
396
00:19:34,760 --> 00:19:36,600
and I mean like punished in the ass.
397
00:19:36,680 --> 00:19:38,080
Like, it's wild.
398
00:19:38,160 --> 00:19:41,920
Yeah, I was really enjoying connecting...
399
00:19:42,000 --> 00:19:43,360
...and learning with you tonight.
400
00:19:43,440 --> 00:19:45,120
- Do you know what I mean?
- Yeah.
401
00:19:45,200 --> 00:19:46,856
Whoa, that is fucked up.
402
00:19:46,880 --> 00:19:47,880
Yeah.
403
00:19:49,160 --> 00:19:53,120
And it's like... it's like you said,
coming out is like going through puberty
404
00:19:53,200 --> 00:19:55,920
and there's just like so much stuff
I want to try.
405
00:19:56,000 --> 00:19:57,720
I've never been with a bisexual guy,
406
00:19:57,800 --> 00:20:01,200
like, maybe you and another guy
could pulverize me.
407
00:20:01,280 --> 00:20:02,760
- George!
- What?
408
00:20:02,840 --> 00:20:05,360
Where'd you learn to normalize
that type of aggressive language?
409
00:20:05,440 --> 00:20:06,280
I...
410
00:20:06,360 --> 00:20:10,800
It just seems like what you're into
is rooted in problematic power dynamics.
411
00:20:10,880 --> 00:20:12,960
Yeah, but that's... that can be fit.
412
00:20:13,040 --> 00:20:15,320
Like... like, sex can be fucked up.
413
00:20:15,960 --> 00:20:18,376
- Like Jafar and Jasmin.
- George, you deserve more than Jafar.
414
00:20:18,400 --> 00:20:19,720
No, I'm the Jafar.
415
00:20:21,040 --> 00:20:24,200
Okay, you have got
a lot of unlearning to do.
416
00:20:24,880 --> 00:20:26,600
All right? Um...
417
00:20:27,760 --> 00:20:32,480
Okay, here's a collection
of essays on feminist sexuality.
418
00:20:32,560 --> 00:20:34,840
- Yeah? Just to get you started.
- Okay.
419
00:20:34,920 --> 00:20:38,000
Here's a chapter on the link
between the male orgasm and war crimes.
420
00:20:38,080 --> 00:20:41,680
I just wanted to watch a bishop smack
a nun on the pussy with a Bible, okay?
421
00:20:42,920 --> 00:20:46,000
And I'm sitting there
watching you, thinking, there's that pain,
422
00:20:46,080 --> 00:20:48,440
you know? And that's your generation.
423
00:20:49,080 --> 00:20:51,600
You're sad. You're really, really sad.
424
00:20:51,680 --> 00:20:53,680
So you're... you're not gonna sign me?
425
00:20:53,760 --> 00:20:56,800
Oh my God, if you don't sign with me,
I will commit arson.
426
00:20:56,880 --> 00:20:59,120
- The big boss loved it.
- Really?
427
00:20:59,200 --> 00:21:00,320
Mm-hmm.
428
00:21:00,400 --> 00:21:03,520
Okay, so great.
Thank you. So I have an agent.
429
00:21:03,600 --> 00:21:05,520
- Absolutely, you do.
- Oh, sick!
430
00:21:05,600 --> 00:21:07,920
We'll speak tomorrow.
We've got a lot of work to do,
431
00:21:08,000 --> 00:21:11,240
and there's already a groupie
waiting for you outside the door.
432
00:21:12,600 --> 00:21:13,680
To fuck you, babe.
433
00:21:13,760 --> 00:21:16,240
- Oh, yeah. Hmm, thanks.
- Have fun.
434
00:21:18,120 --> 00:21:19,320
Hi, Mae!
435
00:21:19,400 --> 00:21:23,080
Excuse me, um, I've been thinking,
are you properly single now?
436
00:21:23,160 --> 00:21:26,800
Because we slept together
a couple of times already in 2018.
437
00:21:26,880 --> 00:21:28,160
I hope you remember.
438
00:21:28,240 --> 00:21:32,160
And my willie loved it,
and we live together now, so I thought...
439
00:21:32,240 --> 00:21:34,560
If I'm gonna bang someone,
I'll just stay somewhere else.
440
00:21:34,640 --> 00:21:37,960
Oh, no, that's not what I meant.
That's the opposite of what I meant.
441
00:21:38,040 --> 00:21:39,040
Sorry.
442
00:21:39,680 --> 00:21:41,080
- Hi.
- Hi.
443
00:21:41,160 --> 00:21:42,800
Uh, oh sorry. Are you busy?
444
00:21:42,880 --> 00:21:44,840
No, no, I'm not. I'm definitely not.
445
00:21:45,920 --> 00:21:47,560
- Hi. I'm George.
- Yes.
446
00:21:48,440 --> 00:21:50,760
You are George. Are you okay?
447
00:21:50,840 --> 00:21:52,040
I'm a big fan.
448
00:21:52,120 --> 00:21:54,080
I was just with my friends,
449
00:21:54,160 --> 00:21:56,800
but I lied
so I could stay and talk to you.
450
00:21:57,920 --> 00:21:59,040
Oh, wow.
451
00:21:59,640 --> 00:22:02,440
Okay. Wow.
Well, it's really nice to meet you.
452
00:22:04,320 --> 00:22:06,040
Sorry, but what the hell is happening?
453
00:22:06,560 --> 00:22:08,800
- I'm sorry. What was your name again?
- George.
454
00:22:08,880 --> 00:22:09,960
- George.
- Yeah.
455
00:22:10,040 --> 00:22:12,240
What's your situation?
Do you have a boyfriend?
456
00:22:12,320 --> 00:22:13,800
I don't have a boyfriend.
457
00:22:13,880 --> 00:22:14,880
- No?
- No.
458
00:22:15,440 --> 00:22:17,520
- Definitely not?
- Definitely not.
459
00:22:18,120 --> 00:22:19,440
That's good.
460
00:22:20,080 --> 00:22:22,320
- Why? Why do you ask?
- I just asked because...
461
00:22:24,640 --> 00:22:27,920
I really want to go back to your house
and take off your clothes.
462
00:22:29,920 --> 00:22:30,920
And make you cum.
463
00:22:32,040 --> 00:22:33,040
Fuck.
464
00:22:37,160 --> 00:22:38,880
I've never done this before.
465
00:22:40,120 --> 00:22:41,120
Are you nervous?
466
00:22:43,160 --> 00:22:45,200
- Are you?
- No.
467
00:23:06,520 --> 00:23:11,560
♪ I was dreaming of the past ♪
468
00:23:14,240 --> 00:23:17,400
♪ And my heart was beating fast ♪
469
00:23:22,960 --> 00:23:23,960
- George.
- Yeah?
470
00:23:24,760 --> 00:23:26,000
Will you do something for me?
471
00:23:26,080 --> 00:23:29,320
Will you tell me that you're never going
to tell your friends about me?
472
00:23:31,400 --> 00:23:32,600
Oh, fuck.
473
00:23:34,960 --> 00:23:37,520
I'm never gonna tell anyone
about this ever.
474
00:23:38,680 --> 00:23:42,640
- Wait, but you do know this is fake...
- I know, I just wanted to hear you say it.
475
00:23:42,720 --> 00:23:43,840
- Okay.
- Just say it.
476
00:23:50,440 --> 00:23:51,960
- Listen to me.
- Uh-huh.
477
00:23:52,040 --> 00:23:55,000
I'm never gonna tell anyone about this.
478
00:23:55,080 --> 00:23:56,280
Oh, fuck.
479
00:23:57,080 --> 00:24:00,320
Tell me you're gonna punish me
for being a basic straight girl.
480
00:24:00,400 --> 00:24:01,560
Oh my God.
481
00:24:03,280 --> 00:24:06,440
But wait, you know that I respect
your multifaceted sexuality...
482
00:24:06,520 --> 00:24:07,520
Say it.
483
00:24:08,160 --> 00:24:09,520
- George.
- Yeah?
484
00:24:12,080 --> 00:24:14,520
I'm gonna absolutely fucking destroy you.
485
00:24:19,840 --> 00:24:21,760
If you ever speak to Lava again,
486
00:24:23,480 --> 00:24:25,320
I'm gonna slit her bird throat.
487
00:24:27,120 --> 00:24:28,600
- Okay.
- Okay?
488
00:24:29,320 --> 00:24:30,320
Yup.
489
00:24:31,520 --> 00:24:36,560
♪ I was shivering inside ♪
490
00:24:39,120 --> 00:24:44,920
♪ I didn't mean to hurt you ♪
491
00:24:47,080 --> 00:24:51,760
♪ And I'm sorry I made you cry ♪
492
00:24:54,400 --> 00:24:57,720
Whoa. Mae, my small dude!
493
00:24:57,800 --> 00:24:59,800
Hi, I'm Mae.
494
00:25:00,440 --> 00:25:02,360
This is my flatmate.
I found him online.
495
00:25:02,400 --> 00:25:03,800
Um, Phil, this is Mae.
496
00:25:04,400 --> 00:25:06,080
- Hi.
- What?
497
00:25:07,040 --> 00:25:08,680
But Mae, it's... it's me Phil.
498
00:25:08,760 --> 00:25:11,400
Oh my God, don't you remember?
What fresh hell is this?
499
00:25:11,480 --> 00:25:13,040
- Mae!
- Phil.
500
00:25:13,120 --> 00:25:15,440
It's all fine.
I'll see you tomorrow, okay?
501
00:25:32,840 --> 00:25:34,080
That was fucked up.
502
00:25:34,160 --> 00:25:35,160
Yeah.
503
00:25:35,640 --> 00:25:36,640
Oh my...
504
00:25:37,520 --> 00:25:38,560
I loved it.
505
00:25:41,440 --> 00:25:44,120
I've never had sex that dark before,
have you?
506
00:25:46,200 --> 00:25:47,200
I...
507
00:25:57,320 --> 00:25:58,320
George.
508
00:25:58,680 --> 00:25:59,680
Yeah?
509
00:26:00,360 --> 00:26:02,200
I think I need to lie under the bed.
510
00:26:02,800 --> 00:26:03,800
Really?
511
00:26:04,280 --> 00:26:05,840
Do you... Do you want some space?
512
00:26:07,600 --> 00:26:10,560
- Do you wanna come with me under the bed?
- Okay.
513
00:26:19,280 --> 00:26:20,880
Mae, why are we under here?
514
00:26:25,760 --> 00:26:26,760
I'm not sure.
515
00:26:28,720 --> 00:26:29,720
Okay.
516
00:26:31,400 --> 00:26:35,000
♪ Fits just like a bruise? ♪
517
00:26:36,280 --> 00:26:40,400
♪ Oh, you're gone to me ♪
518
00:27:02,280 --> 00:27:04,560
♪ Oh, you're gone... ♪